"I'll go God....send me." - Isaiah, the Prophet
A holy ambition is something you really want to do that God wants you to do for His glory. Something you want to do so much that doing it keeps you from doing other things you really like to do. It controls you. Gives passion to your life. An eternal focus. It helps you decide no to do this, go here, or join that yet. It is molded by a personal encounter with the living Christ. Shaped and informed by the written word of God. Fits into His overall plan. It meets a need in the world that is displayed as a form of love and not about self-exaltation. I know this is what God has been building it in my heart since the day He saved me. A deep, yearning desire to create provocative, relevant art for His glory. A desire to display it in the darkest places. A desire to walk and disciple other artists who have been called to do the same.
Paul talks about God's holy ambition in Ephesians 3. "By God’s grace and mighty power, I have been given the privilege of serving him by spreading this Good News. Though I am the least deserving of all God’s people, he graciously gave me the privilege of telling the Gentiles about the endless treasures available to them in Christ. I was chosen to explain to everyone this mysterious plan that God, the Creator of all things, had kept secret from the beginning. God’s purpose in all this was to use the church to display his wisdom in its rich variety to all the unseen rulers and authorities in the heavenly places. This was his eternal plan, which he carried out through Christ Jesus our Lord." (Eph. 3:7-11) This passage has placed its roots in my heart.
God chose Paul. God gave Paul this holy desire for the Gentiles to know Christ. Paul writes about how this is not about him. It is so much bigger than being the apostle Paul. He knows he is the least deserving of all God's people to even share the Gospel, yet Paul doesn't stay here and ramble on about how undeserving he is. He talks about why God is doing it. God gave this holy ambition to Paul based on how He uniquely created Paul through gifts, talents, personality type, abilities, and so on. More importantly, God is revealing His eternal plan and displaying His rich wisdom by Paul telling the Gentiles about the endless treasures available to them in Christ. This holy ambition fits into God's overall plan carried out through Christ Jesus.
This is what I believe God has given to me....a holy calling that fits into His overall plan. He has put my eyes up on a heavenly prize that I have never seen. To be honest, would have never chosen on my own. In July 2016, I left go of the only life I've known since I graduated college in 2009. I left because of this holy ambition as a creative. I must admit two things: I literally have no idea what this will look like and I have a tendency to focus more on the art than the One who is working through the art. I have no idea if letting go of that life was the "right choice" for lack of better terms. This can be scary. Day by day, the Spirit reminds me it isn't my job to know, but to trust that He knows. Not just this, but all things at all times. Because of that, my job is to stay close, trust Him, and leap.
"It is easier to serve or work for God without a vision and without a call, because then you are not bothered by what he requires. Common sense, covered with a layer of Christian emotion, becomes your guide. You may be more prosperous and successful from the world's perspective, and will have more leisure time, if you never acknowledge the call of God. But once you receive a commission from Jesus Christ, the memory of what God asks of you will always be there to prod you on to do His will. You will no longer be able to work for Him on the basis of common sense." - Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest